Glad Tidings with Mixed Signals – Part 2 (Op-Ed 01/25/21)

By Tonja Condray Klein(c)11/25/21

“While what is going on may not affect us personally yet, what is going on will keep getting closer to affecting EVERYONE. Church of Jesus Christ, we MUST begin praying intercession and protection over this country’s freedoms we have enjoyed our whole lives but have taken for granted for probably that long too. Hold onto your faith. Reach out to others that need to know Jesus as Savior. Support each other and let baseless arguments end. We need to be in one mind and one accord to see the hand of the Lord rescue us, whether physically in this world or spiritually to get ready to leave this world. The endgame may have begun. Read Ezekiel 37, for it seems to already be happening right now … the people of Israel are returning to their country. That might mean 38 and 39 are upon us, and if so then we might be leaving sooner than was expected. Pray. Read. Share. Church of the Living God, Redemption is drawing nigh to ALL who know Jesus Christ as their Savior. We NEED a Revival of HIS people – ALL of the Christians and Messianic Jews alike! Read the Book, DON’T WAIT FOR THE MOVIE like White Heart’s song stated in 1986! Like so many of their songs that were prophetic then, they are even more so NOW in 2021.”

The words in the quotes was a post I put on Facebook 01/24/21. I thought it was only going to be a ‘post’, but as I thought about it hours later I realized it was the beginning of another Op-Ed meant for a much larger media outlet sharing. While it said what I was thinking about the most then it didn’t give the whole picture I’d intended. In case anyone thought I was making up the claim that many were going back to Israel then you would be completely wrong. I based this fact on actual verified news from two sources. It’s been happening actually since before Covid-19.

Due to several word-wide situations happening, including here in the United States, I’m aware that Christians all over the world are dealing with what all who claim Christ might face in even a few years from now if the Rapture doesn’t take place soon. Yes, I realize that people have been claiming that the Rapture would be happening at their certain dates, events, or ‘signs’ for as long as the oldest living person in 2021 has been alive. There are still defining things that really haven’t been around before now though, so those changes do make a difference that matters.

Technology has become a continually changing thing that could create some things spoken of in prophecy that couldn’t be explained properly by previous writers from hundreds to thousands of years ago. Even physical descriptions of today’s weapons would be different and unable to even be imagined for centuries. In writing my Eirinth Book 2 with characters from present-day Earth translated to medieval style Eirinth, I realized how different things could be viewed in that situation… computers and screens alone would be seen as ‘supernatural’ in nature.

Point of view is a thing that all writers have to consider while writing scenes, emotions, places, and even fighting sequences. With all of the different countries involved in following the anti-Christ and in the fighting during the end of the Great Tribulation Battle of Armageddon, I have to shake my head in horror and sadness from thinking about those that are on Earth then. My point of view right now is before the actual time, and I’m trying to find something to help as many as I can to understand that God Almighty made the Way to keep anyone from being in that!

How can mankind refuse the loving gift of Grace that costs you nothing but belief? “Wait!” some of you shout in anger, “I can’t do this, and I can’t do that, so it costs me everything I want!” When you really understand and believe that Jesus Christ died to save you from Hell then you WANT to follow what HE told His believers to do. ALL of what He says to NOT do IS to protect you. Do I understand WHY? Yes. It really helps if you study what the Christian Holy Bible says to see the reasoning for the whys and the NOTs. Doing a ‘NOT’ can end up being deadly.

I have drunk alcohol. I have smoked cigarettes. I have had sex outside of marriage. I have cussed. I have written some things that I will see burned up in front of me at the judgement seat of Christ too. I’m not perfect. I simply accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Savior, Lord, King, and God Almighty in the Son. Do I ever doubt? Yes, I do. I also tell God all the time that IF I’m wrong and end up disappearing from existence at my death instead of being in Heaven with Him, then how could I have felt His Holy Spirit in me with His gifts being used? That IS my proof!

I would rather believe on Jesus Christ than go in the direction of any religion. They would lead to eternity in Hell with Satan and his demons. Heaven with Jesus or even existence dust would be MUCH BETTER than the alternative. All the other religions I’ve studied have a person ‘work’ for any hope of not being destroyed. The love and fellowship of my Jesus versus the coldness of religion is not even a point I consider. I’ve had the Holy Spirit move through me for the past 35 years in private and in church services, and that’s WHY doubt falls to my Faith experience.

Test the Holy Spirit. God told us to seek, ask, test, and even question in several scriptures. God Almighty wants for us to KNOW HIM PERSONALLY. This is what all ‘religions’ can’t understand. While Christianity is categorized as that too and even has songs with that designation used, I think we really should call it a Supernatural Experience instead. This is WHY the apostles were told to wait in Jerusalem for the Holy Spirit to come to them. Jesus wanted them to have the Comforter to remind them, console them, teach them, and empower them so doubt would fail.

It’s easy to get bewildered, frustrated, downtrodden, fearful, and even depressed right now with the crazy things going on in this world. I sometimes wish I could travel back in time to when things seemed more balanced than they are now. Then I think about possibly missing the moment when Jesus Christ returns to take His people, both Christians and Messianic Jews home to Heaven, and I can’t afford to miss THAT! I’m encouraging every person to take a spiritual test regarding Jesus Christ, compare the scriptures with the news, and PRAY for God to give you His Light!

GLAD TIDINGS WITH MIXED SIGNALS – PART 1 (Op-Ed 01-18-21)

I’m supposed to be writing my third Eirinth Fantasy Novel, but right now I’m distressed at seeing the possible end to a couple of my freedoms soon, and I feel helpless to do anything about it. As a born-again Spirit-filled believer in Jesus Christ as Savior, I’m also seeing the possibility that book 3 can’t be published because of that loss of freedom and the fact that as a Christian I might be translated from here at any time. While I think this could happen during the Jewish holiday Rosh Hashanah, it could happen as soon as the last person in the current church age accepts Jesus Christ as their Savior.

The Christian happening of the Rapture or ‘calling away’ has been dismissed, debated, and fought over probably since Jesus Christ ascended to Heaven. I’m not going to argue with someone who disagrees with me over whether it will happen BEFORE the Great Tribulation (Pre-Trib), DURING (Mid-Trib), AFTER (Post-Trib), or NO Tribulation (called A-Millennial). I’m a Pre-Tribber myself just to make my stance perfectly clear. While I understand reasons for the other stances, I don’t agree with their layout of the scriptures or reasons for their interpretations of them.

Could I be wrong? Stranger things have happened, but probably not with this. Why? The accepted explanation in the churches that believe this is that the anti-Christ can’t take over until the Holy Spirit in the Christ believers has left this dimension. The Christian Bible book of Revelation has the ‘churches’ listed until John is ‘called up’ in Chapter 4, which is seen as a preview of the church. No ‘church’ is mentioned again until Jesus Christ returns for Armageddon, and then a New Jerusalem descends from Heaven near the end of Revelation. This isn’t an illusion or fiction story. It’s the future.

Yay! Bring out the balloons, party poppers, food galore, and lots of beautiful clothes to celebrate! Wait… not so fast. The Christian Bible also tells in the Gospel and Apostle Books that in ‘the end times’ that “dangerous times” will be here. Oh. That seems rather ominous. Yes, it is. As things change for America in 2021, things will probably get as bad as those of us in my generation of Gen-Xers have ever seen. Then again, it’s my generation that’s just now getting to the age where we are no longer that important to the majority of any group in our country. It’s pretty sad and very frustrating.

Most of us are grandparents now. I’m not, but my brother’s oldest daughter is, making me be a great-great aunt. In other words, Gen-X is OLD NOW. My best friend from high school is a grandma too. While I deal with my allergies and Relapsing-Remitting Multiple Sclerosis (MS), I don’t actually feel OLD. Do I feel sickly more often than I used to? Yes. Do I feel OLD? No! I published my second Fantasy novel and have five more named. I was getting ready to begin Book 3, SEEKING THE LIGHT, but I’m concerned that what I should be writing is more of this right now while I can.

The tightening of control over media outlets has already begun. I might not have my pages on Facebook, Twitter, Linked-In, or even Live Journal at some point. I might lose my two websites that I post most content on all the time too. This is really BAD for more conservative-minded individuals. It is ALSO a complete misuse of power. This is NOT to cause anything with violence or demeaning of other individuals. This is to inform my fellow believers and those not yet believers of what is coming down the turnpike soon. I’m used to being FREE! This will be completely unacceptable!

Once total control happens then I don’t know how I will be able to keep in contact with people I know, family that are in different areas of the USA, or even the people around the world who listen to my music or read my books. THIS IS NOT OKAY. As it was for so many during the pandemic interfering with their interaction, this may begin interfering with my creative passion. Now if the powers that be try to quell me and then think they can make me follow their rules for the sake of rules, think again. They might end up with one of the Robert Wallaces of the 21st Century… FREEDOM!

I am very well aware that Wallace DIED for his freedom. I really don’t want to have to die, but if what they ask of me goes against my moral conscience or personal beliefs then I might have to at that point. I’m not going to be violent and will be as legal in my actions as I can for as long as I can. I just know that Americans will only let people abuse their trust and sensibilities to a certain point. I’m praying that government, media, and companies that are warning us that we won’t be as free as we were before will THINK before they DO anything against our country’s GIVEN RIGHTS to the people.

All of us who use multi-media to keep in touch with those we know and love might want to find other ways to do that beyond what media moguls allow. Old school ways to communicate might need to be re-learned. I’m a real webpage designer for private business so this hurts me to my core, but those days might come to an end as far as my right to write and post my opinions. This makes me angry. If I wasn’t a Christian it would make me react worse, and I have to rein in my emotions now still. I’m livid, and I can’t ignore it, but I can try my best to calm my actions from my reactions to it.

So what does all of this mean? I’m not really sure. In eschatological terms the Christians might be leaving sooner than expected in 2021 or later. In real-time terms the Christians could be leaving sooner than expected too. In world-view terms the Christians better leave sooner than they expected for our sakes. We don’t know exactly WHEN since ‘no man knows the day or the hour’ according to the Christian Bible, but we’re supposed to know the season. Do we? Do you? Many have preached for my almost forty-nine years that the Church would be crying out for Jesus to return. Are we?

IF we no longer have FREEDOM, will we cry out? IF we no longer can see our loved ones at all, will we cry out? IF we no longer can sing songs of praise to our Savior, will we cry out? IF we no longer can get food or medicine, will we cry out? IF we can no longer refuse to get documents in digital format or take vaccines that are questionable, will we cry out? IF we can no longer go between states without having government papers of travel, will we cry out? IF we can no longer work anywhere if a past moment of peaceful Free Speech is noted that we’re tagged with, will we cry out?

What are you willing to allow happen against OUR FREEDOM to make you finally cry out?

“The Attack on Freedom of Speech in 2021”

Op-Ed by Tonja Condray Klein©01/17/21

There was a time in my older sister’s life before I was born when the issue of Freedom of Speech made people rise up against censorship and called those actions illegal according to the First Amendment. It led to varied stances for society, education, and personal liberty, and while it began to protect views against a party in power, it also held for all opposite views to be protected too. Now, certain media outlets are beginning to take accounts away from those with an opposing view to silence them. We must maintain Freedom of Speech for ALL AMERICAN CITIZENS in 2021!

The First Amendment of the United States of America’s Constitution states that, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech; or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.” It has been understood that this amendment protects American citizens with the right to express views on any issue in open forums, and that the government can’t deprive you of that unless it’s classified and could danger our country’s safety.

There are many ideas, concepts, descriptions, or expletives that I will never support and try to stay away from as much as humanly possible; but I also support the right for those that support one or all of them to express or support any of them as long as not expressly illegal for them to do so since FREEDOM OF SPEECH is for every legal American. Is this troublesome to me at times? Yes. Will I still support this amendment even if I don’t agree with the content used by someone else that has a view opposite of mine? Yes. Why? Right or wrong, this is an important American Freedom!

As long as a person’s freedom doesn’t take away the freedom of another then it is what this country was founded upon in 1776 and upheld for over two hundred-forty-five years; but now different methods of speech are being limited by media outlets claiming the speech goes against stated rules for users. While private companies have that right, if they are working with government agents who DO have to follow the First Amendment, then their users’ First Amendment rights ARE being violated since the company is no longer ‘private’ in the way the other statutes require it to be for protection.

If the company rules are examined and the speech is blocked when it doesn’t obviously violate the rules listed for users, then that makes it become a form of suppression that has been used by other kinds of governments but NOT with a democratic republic such as ours. This is something this country has fought against since its creation. If it’s allowed then it will mean at least half of our country will no longer be allowed to have the same rights as those who will agree with the new political regime that will govern for four years. ALL AMERICANS SHOULD HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH!

Will this op-ed change the minds of those who have actually been taught false government history that is against our democratic republic? I would say, “Probably not”. Mind-altering programming in education has taken away the rights of children to learn historical FACTS or more than one viewpoint for them to decide if they want history to repeat or not. Some things do have more than one side for a discussion, but others are not only globally true but also universally. Once Freedom of Speech is removed from a major dissenting group then those taking power make slaves out of all the others.

Mankind has always tried to exert personal power over others throughout history, but THIS IS NOT AMERICA! Humanity is flawed, and we have failed often, but our country’s founders tried to make America an example at that time of what FREEDOM should strive to be. While we have had our moments of leaders failing groups of people in the past, 2021 should not put us in any of those positions again! Rights as stated in our Constitution should be legislated as stated and not changed on the whim of a certain group with political bias that defeats our government system as a whole.

As a Protestant Christian I don’t want my faith to be persecuted or for those who share it to be silenced. I have friends who are Catholic, Jewish, Buddhist, Islamic, and Wiccan so I want their rights to be protected too. We should all have the right to declare our faith as Free Speech allows, compare differences if agreed upon by those in discussion, and not attack each other physically unless in defense. Any other issue should be peacefully debated by those with differing viewpoints. Generations since mine seem to have lost the ability to do any of this at all, and that’s sad and wrong.

I have two webpages that I am now concerned about losing simply because of my viewpoints, opinions, and faith; this is something I never thought I’d face in my lifetime. I have family and friends who are on the opposite side of politics and religion, but I want their rights to be kept free as much as I want my own to be. THAT is a democratic republic. Now if I’m right about my Christian faith and Jesus Christ returns to rule from Jerusalem after the Great Tribulation, then I’ll embrace HIS Theocracy since it will be by our Creator and my Savior. Until then, a democratic republic is my choice.

Facebook, Linked-In, and even LiveJournal may not allow my opinion editorials to be shared on their platforms, but I’m hoping that they and the website hosts will NOT try to silence differing opinions simply for the sake of power. I don’t seek power but want equal justice for ALL Americans regardless of race, color, creed, religion, or gender. THAT’S the American way I was raised on, and I want to have the FREEDOM to share what I know with whomever I wish if they are willing to read or listen. What they do after that is up to them. I WANT FREEDOM OF SPEECH PROTECTED!

“Quantum Tunnel Me Up, Jesus!” OP-ED 01/07/21

By Tonja Condray Klein©01/07/21

I’ve been studying a lot of odd things over the past few years that at first seemed more the “Sci-Fi/Fantasy Fiction Lover” part of me than the “Christian End-of-Times Salvation Writer” part of me. As things seem to be changing in direct and despairing ways, I’ve recently noticed that these two parts of me are finally making sense as those two divergent ways also seem to be merging. Why would a certain part of our government demand another part of our government to give any factual information on extra-terrestrial beings that apparently has been found, studied, and even examined physically?

When Nick Pope appeared on Tucker Carlson’s program on Fox News, I took notice of it since I’ve also been an intellectual watcher of “Ancient Aliens” as research for my Non-Fiction Christian Speculative novel, and Nick Pope is a regular. I wrote an essay on my tribulationhelp.com website already about how ‘extra-terrestrials’ could be linked later as a way to discount the ‘Rapture’ of Christian believers when we supernaturally disappear from this Earth. With the sudden change in leadership in 2021, the government may not share anything about ‘aliens’ until it is of greatest convenience.

I’m not the only Christian asking about these intersections of science fiction and Christian eschatology either. At one point many scientists were also Christians in this world but not in 2021. It seems that when science began discounting Christianity, many Christian leaders decided to discount them and claim that science itself was evil. Spiritual forefathers abandoned scholastics, and that’s why academia has become a weapon against God. God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit ARE the Creators of science! When God the Creator said, “Let there be light”, the Word began all science disciplines!

I took three years of Chemistry and loved all of the complexities of combining different elements to cause various reactions. It spoke to me as a person of imagination and was also why I created my one character translated from Earth in TREADING THE PATH to be able to do it visually in the mythical parallel world of Eirinth. If I can write my stories in 2021 to have some truth in the fiction, what do you think people have been doing for the thousands of years we’ve been here? The ‘myths’ possibly locked away in Alexandria by the Christian leaders centuries ago might be history instead.

“That’s crazy!” some of you may yell in outrage. Are you forgetting ‘Parables’ Jesus used in His teachings to reach the people emotionally and practically? “But any fiction is false and evil!” more of you cry out in anger. The last time I checked my Holy Bible, JESUS NEVER SINNED! How could parables (spoken stories meant for a purpose but NOT actually happening) be evil if spoken by Jesus Christ, Son of the One True Living God Almighty? IF DONE FOR THE SAME PURPOSE – TO LEAD PEOPLE TO SALVATION – THEY AREN’T! Wake up and read the Truth!

I know there are a lot of people who claim to be ‘Christian’ that haven’t really accepted Jesus Christ as his or her Personal Savior. Like the ‘Republicans in name only’ or RINOS, those who don’t KNOW JESUS aren’t His. I seriously don’t want a single person to not understand the distinction and be lost on this Earth, especially after Christ believers are relocated to Heaven while destruction on Earth happens as judgement. I know it’s been warned about for centuries, but don’t you think the longer is seems to take means the closer we are to the spiritual ENDGAME? Use your brain!

Yes, you are dealing with someone who loves the Marvel hero movies! Did you ever wonder why there are so many fictional heroes that have been created over the existence of time? Whether we are talking about musical, mystical, mythological, science-fictional, or anime-central these all point to what each person’s soul longs for… the Savior! It is in our genes, programmed into our DNA by the Creator of all existence, and crying out for what our fallen sin-nature fights against. THAT is WHY we NEED a SAVIOR! Not just any hero but the One willing to become flesh without sin for us!

The link in all of this is actually simple. The angel Lucifer fell to become Satan and tried to pollute the bloodline of humanity through having other fallen angels bed human women to create ‘Giants’ spoken of in the Torah, Holy Bible of Christianity, and proven history. The ‘Nephilim’ in Hebrew were to stop Jesus Christ from being able to be born intact. IF Satan could have every human woman have even a bit of Nephilim blood then Jesus Christ couldn’t be born in human form without sin to die for humanity to give Salvation through Faith. It’s not rocket science but God’s immortal science!

As more things are happening and look like Bible Prophecies being actually fulfilled in ways that couldn’t happen until now, Christians need to really take a good look at where you are, what you are doing for Christ, and why you fight so hard against admitting that we ALL have sinned and come short of the glory of God. We need to LOVE ONE ANOTHER and get over ourselves! We shouldn’t accept sin as being ‘okay’, ‘water down’ the Gospel of Jesus Christ, or focus on the ‘building a kingdom’ on our own either. We NEED to NEED JESUS more than anything else in this whole universe!

I don’t discredit PROVEN science. I don’t discount Science Fiction either. Supernatural is the dichotomy of the spiritual with the natural intertwined like the DNA strands of our humanity. Yes, I do write FICTION. Yes, I do believe in CHRISTIANITY. Do I honestly think that the two coexist in a Truth that certain groups keep trying to deny because they can’t comprehend the possibility even though God Almighty is a conundrum in Reality? YES! For the Quadrillion to the Umpteenth power, YES! NONE of us know the extensive levels of existence and ability of our Creator. No, not one!

This is meant to not only get Christians to truly think about the reality of our imminent departure but also to call out to those who have dismissed Jesus Christ as a myth or some other foolery that just wants control over you. How many of you are already giving people, places, things, or even substances power enough to control you? No matter what I had to let go of to gain my Faith, it NEVER could have given to me what JESUS HAS ALREADY. Do I have problems? Yes. Do I have times of discouragement? Yes. Do I have moments of doubt? Yes. Why do I still want Jesus? HE IS LIFE!

I have Relapsing Remitting Multiple Sclerosis in remission. Do I believe in Healing? Yes. Am I angry that God hasn’t given it to me completely yet? No. Why? Job spoke it the best when he said, “Even though He slay me, yet will I trust Him!” Ever wonder why the Centurion followed what Jesus told him to do? He KNEW what Jesus said would be. Once you have an experience with the Soul-Saving Son of the Most High God of Creation, YOU KNOW. Even if you doubt sometimes, you’ll find yourself speaking that Faith in spite of any fear. Because HE Lives I can face tomorrow!

I don’t know the battles you are now fighting. I don’t know if you are at the point of giving up. I don’t even know if you are in a place where you will give Jesus Christ a chance to show you what He has for you. I don’t, but HE DOES. I had a car wreck a week before Christmas 2020, so how could I write this since my 2011 Chevy Aveo was totaled? I hit the small bit of water and hydroplaned into an Xterra, but I only got two bruised knees. Do you know how tank-like an Xterra is? I DO NOW! I also KNOW that my guardian angel used that water to slide me in a way so my airbag didn’t trigger.

Why did the accident happen? Maybe it was for the driver of the other vehicle, the tow truck driver, the rental car driver, the insurance customer service agent, or the insurance adjustor. I gave cards to all of those I met in person that has my websites listed and told those on the phone the websites too. Maybe one of them needed an unusual way that points to Jesus, and I may not know until the Judgement Seat of Christ in Heaven after I’m evacuated from Earth spiritually… or supernaturally as the terms fits. That brings me to the reason for the title of this odd op-ed that may be ignored by most.

After being a Sci-Fi fan for forty years I finally think I found a proper scientific term for the ‘Rapture’ or ‘Calling Away’ of the believers in Christ known as the Church – Quantum Tunneling! I read about this in an article on Wikipedia, but they didn’t give the author name for me to give proper credit so just look it up if you want to read more on it. The term actually is talking about the phenomena in relation to nuclear fusion, but as I read it I began thinking about how Jesus rose again. The New Testament says that our bodies during the Rapture will become like that of Jesus after His resurrection.

What if it DOES take the same kind of powerful energy like nuclear fusion to transform us? What if instead of a flight through the sky we will be taking a rocket-blast through the dimensional realm? What if all that we think we know in logistical data from spiritually-minded mentors turns out to be even less than what was proposed in Star Trek? What if my song lyrics for “Like Rocket Fire” are more reality than even I thought? What if our departure really will be like that Quantum Tunneling with Divine protection? Well, I guess that means I should pray, “Quantum Tunnel Me Up, Jesus!”

“When an Accident is a Reminder of the Grace in Christmas”

By Tonja Condray Klein (Op-Ed 12/21/20)

On Saturday 12/19/20, I had an accident on the way home from shopping for Christmas presents. I was only five miles or so away from home at a light I know like the back of my hand when I realized an SUV in front of me wasn’t yet moving even though the light was green. I had already slowed down, but I hadn’t expected my last pump on the break to send me into a fish-tail. The pavement was slick from rain I hadn’t expected since I hadn’t had any issues all the way to that point, so all I could do was hold onto the steering wheel, scream out to Jesus to help, and wait for the impact.

The impact was not as bad as it could have been since I wasn’t going that fast from having already slowed on the way to the light. I haven’t had an accident or a ticket for the past thirty years. Yes, that’s right, I wrote 30 YEARS! After the pain in my knees got my attention I realized the impact had ended. I was okay except for bruises I knew I’d have on my knees from the dash and soreness in my shoulders from the hit jerking me. The man from the vehicle in front that I had rear-ended due to stupid rain making the pavement slick came to see if I was okay. He and his SUV were okay.

The man called the police to report the accident, and I called Ken to tell him about the wreck. The man and I both took pics of the other’s id and insurance cards then moved the cars to an empty lot on the same street. After ordering a tow for my car so badly crushed in front that I was barely able to turn the wheel to get car into the lot, the man and I waited for the police to arrive. I gave him one of my cards, and he told me that he was a Fantasy reader. I began telling him about my books and music then showed him the artwork of my characters I’d put on my phone and done by my amazing artist.

The police came, I got that stupid ticket the rain caused, then man left, and then I waited for the tow truck. I had to put more coat hood up and gloves on since the temperature was dropping and I couldn’t have my heat on due to the fluid leaking from my car. I was still a bit jarred. I simply thought that it happened for a reason, so I accepted it… until a rental car couldn’t be obtained until Monday which meant Ken would have to miss work since our other car was still in the shop. That was when I began coming apart emotionally. If this happened for a reason then why weren’t things working out?

Trusting God in the midst of problems isn’t easy, no matter how long you’ve known Jesus as Savior. I’ve known Jesus as Savior since I was eight years old, and I’m forty-eight in 2020. I still felt like giving up earlier today when I kept beating myself up over the ‘what ifs’ and kept feeling worse since the wreck was my fault and Ken was going to have to miss work… my fault too. Things are always my fault when I can’t get things to work out right. Ken doesn’t agree with me, and when I keep berating myself over a failure, it hurts him. I need to pray about that and read scripture against it.

Could this have turned out worse? Yes, I could have continued fish-tailing and ended up hitting a car that killed someone. Yes, I could have not fish-tailed and hit the SUV in the middle that would have deployed the air bag that might have hurt or killed me. Yes, the fact that the airbag did not go off means that the car won’t be totaled and is actually able to be fixed. Yes, if we didn’t have comprehensive insurance none of this could be fixed at all. As upset as I am to have an almost perfect driving record ended, at least no one was hurt badly or killed, and I was able to share my faith during it.

I believed that until today when I began to feel like I was useless, worthless, and purpose-less. Do those feelings come from a woman who continues to fight an ongoing auto-immune disease that is currently in remission? Not usually, but a new fear of driving in any weather other than sunshine might. An old fear of fear of letting down the people that I love at the worst times always does. An old fear of driving in rain already has as part of the new one. So how does this accident that was personal yet not fatal show how anyone else but me can be reminded of Grace at Christmas by this?

Ask the man who I rear-ended who may be reading my book or listening to my songs and may have known Jesus and is encouraged or maybe hadn’t but finds the way to Faith. Ask the tow truck driver who was already a Jesus believer but shared the news of his recent baptism with me but didn’t know why except that I had K-Love radio on in my car. Ask those reading this right now still asking the first question but still go to look up my books, my songs, or K-Love radio just because they read this out of curiosity and yet find something else that makes Christmas become that time of Grace.

Jesus Christ was born in Bethlehem over two thousand years ago, and He was crucified when he reached the age of thirty-three-and-a-half for every single human to be given a chance to accept His sacrifice by Grace through Faith, and never something by them since it’s a Gift of God. I sometimes forget that nothing is ever about me or my abilities. Every time something happens is a possibility to show God’s Love, Mercy, and Grace. If He uses my feeble skills or words then my joy should be full even if it hurt my pride, my body, or even my record in anything. Jesus is Lord, and I am His.

This Christmas 2020 is going to be hard for so many people who have lost loved ones, the ability to give to their families due to loss of resources, and even the rights to be with those they love even if the gathering be it ever so humble before is being taken away completely. I won’t be able to do what I’d had planned for my family since our car will be in the shop, and even if we should have a rental Monday, the weather is to be snowy on Christmas Eve and I couldn’t drive in it before the accident and especially not now after the accident and in a rental. It may be a Blue Christmas for most.

Let my accident be a reminder of the Grace in Christmas! Even if things are hard and horrible for you right now, try to see the Grace of the Savior in the face of the baby in a Manger as you sing carols via skype, Facetime, or Chat. Try to reach out in a safe but meaningful way to those who are hurting or alone by using those ways too and send food to them if they can’t order it for themselves. Try to share the same kind of Grace shown at Christmas to be found at Calvary once it fills your heart with Salvation. Even if you have accidents happen later you will then find His reasons will be enough.

“Beautiful Star of Bethlehem, Shine On!”

By Tonja Condray Klein

As we approach Christmas in 2020 with the “Christmas Star” occurring on 12/21, we should try to remember what that star meant over two thousand years ago and then what it could mean for us now. I’m not a soothsayer, theologian, or even a degree-bearing scholar (except the Technical Certificate for Webpage Development). I’m not the only Christian believer who is looking at this ‘sign’ with interest, hope, and maybe even concern since the Holy Bible states that we should be looking at the signs of the times in order to understand when the Grace Dispensation we are currently living in will almost be at a final ending. This should propel us to spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ for as much time as we have!

I’m not religious. I’m a Born-Again, Spirit-Filled, Believer in the Blood of Jesus Christ as the ONLY way for my birth dealt sinful blood to be exchanged by His death on Calvary with Grace by Faith and that not of myself. It IS the Gift of God unto Salvation NOW AND FOREVER! Although a horrible and destructive Great Tribulation Period replaces the Grace Dispensation Period, it hasn’t happened yet, and Christians need to be PREACHING, SINGING, and TEACHING like never before. Our time might be limited. We don’t know if this star is a reminder or if it symbolizes something more. Do I want to go home to Heaven? YES! Do I want others to take this seriously? YES!! Do I think it’s time? Maybe…

I realize that the believers in Jesus Christ have thought this many times over the past 2000 years. This is not to ‘scare’ people into a ‘religious’ experience. This is to AWAKEN BELIEVERS to share the Gospel we already know and to help others to at least get what we already have – a Personal Relationship with Jesus Christ as Savior, the Son of God the Father and giver of God the Holy Spirit as our Comforter after shedding His blood for our sins, rising from the grave, and going to Heaven to wait until this time is over and the focus turns to Israel again. Do you see the shift already? I do! It’s been an ongoing shift for a decade or more. As a Believer for Christ, don’t you feel the stirring? Can’t you hear the whisper inside?

AWAKE! AWAKE, WARRIORS FOR CHRIST! SHARE THE GOSPEL, HEAL THE SICK, AND RAISE THE DEAD! WE ARE NOT POWERLESS! THE HOLY SPIRIT RAISED JESUS FROM THE DEAD, AND WE WERE PROMISED TO BE ABLE TO DO EVEN MORE THAN THAT IF WE SIMPLY BELIEVE IT! WE MUST ARISE! SHAKE OFF SIN’S SHACKLES! EMBRACE FREEDOM OF THE GIFTS OF THE HOLY SPIRIT! AWAKEN LIKE NEVER BEFORE AND BE RELEASED! GOD IS NOT DEAD, NO, NO, HE’S STILL ALIVE! GOD IS NOT DEAD, NO, NO, HE’S STILL ALIVE! I FEEL HIM IN MY HANDS! I FEEL HIM IN MY FEET! I FEEL HIM IN MY HEART!

BOOM, BOOM! I FEEL HIM IN MY SOUL! WHEW! FEEL HIM ALL OVER ME! Isn’t that what you want? Isn’t that what you need? Isn’t that what you thirst for? Isn’t that what you hunger for? Isn’t it? I’m in tears right now LONGING for the RETURN of the ones who WANT ALL HE GAVE! It’s FREE. It’s REAL. It’s FOREVER. It’s ALL-CONSUMING FIRE! NOTHING ELSE MATTERS! You either know that you know that you know… or you don’t. If you don’t know then YOU NEED TO FIND HIM! FIND HIM IN THE FIRE. FIND HIM IN THE FLOOD. FIND HIM IN THE HOSPITAL BED. FIND HIM IN THE FUNERAL. FIND HIM IN THE BAR. FIND HIM IN THE STRIP CLUB.

YOU CAN FIND HIM WAITING FOR YOU EVERYWHERE! You just have to LOOK for the Truth of Jesus. The problem is that too many people who call themselves CHRISTIAN don’t know that they know that they know either. WE ALL NEED REVIVED! For the love of everything Holy you need REVIVED! EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US! I don’t care which denomination you are. I don’t care which preacher you claim. I don’t care which church you give to. WE ALL NEED TO BE REVIVED BY GOD ALMIGHTY! Jesus Christ gave us a mandate. Are you fulfilling it? Are you living it? I fail all the time, but as God Almighty is my witness, I AM TRYING TO REACH YOU! Don’t click away. Destiny calls.

“Father God, I come to you in the name of Jesus Christ. I believe He is Your Son who died on the cross of Calvary to pay for my sins if I will believe and confess that I do and then live my life to be His soldier of Light to this world from now on. I will try to follow what the Christian Bible states in the New Testament and study the Old Testament to show I belong to You now. Let Your Holy Spirit give what spiritual gift or gifts you wish for me to use for Your Glory. Help me to be a Light to this world in these turbulent times. Lead me in the path You already planned for me before I was born. I am Yours and You are mine! In the name of Jesus Christ, my Savior, Lord, King, and God incarnate… AMEN!”

If you have prayed this, YOU ARE SAVED! Believing is the first step. Living it is an ongoing task of daily trials, failures, and victories. It isn’t easy, but if you keep praying, reading the Bible (start with John, Romans, 1 Corinthians, and Ephesians), and listen to music that ministers – if you love rock then start with Disciple, White Heart, and Skillet; if you love contemporary then start with Mercy Me, Carmen, and Toby Mac; if you love southern gospel start with The Imperials, Hinsons, and Kingsmen. Some are gone now, but their music will live through eternity. There are many others! The styles are plentiful so find your groove to make your soul move toward Jesus more and His Purpose for you!

Andrus, Blackwood, and Company was so long ago, but I jam to “Jesus, You’re So Wonderful” all the time, and it along with the others is mostly available on iTunes. I have versions of most of these on Vinyl, Cassette, CD, and now Digital on my iPhone or computer! You can listen to my songs I wrote and then professionally recorded on my website: https://www.eirinth.com at the link FOR FREE! You can also read the Prologue through Chapter 6 for BOTH of my Fantasy Novels at that link FOR FREE too and then buy on Amazon in E-Book or Paperback! Finding a church right now is difficult, but you can listen to WGNZ radio 1110am and 104.7fm to various ministers that preach the truth you need!

Message me on Facebook if you have a question or need links that can help more. Until then, May Jesus Christ Bless You And Keep You In His Care! Look up on December 21st to see the Christmas Star!

Scrooges Can Change But Can Those Seeking Power Now?

By Tonja Condray Klein – 12/07/20

As Christmas, Hanukah, Kwanza, and other Holidays approach, is there any way that we all will be allowed to celebrate the way all free Americans were promised with our United States of America Constitution and Bill of Rights? While I understand the danger of Covid-19 and practice proper precautions, some measures (even in Ohio) are beyond common sense and have a foretelling of terrorizing government waiting in the wings if the American people let it. It’s something that my Veteran father would have been enraged over since these statutes are like what he fought against!

The people of our country have faced some of the greatest trials of existence, but we kept finding abilities to excel beyond our limitations with the common goal to be free and make this land free for generations to come; at times through battle when no other course of action was available. At other times we won through diplomacy to protect our citizens and soldiers. We pulled together in this time of medical peril and even found treatments and the coming vaccine for our latest foe. Are we now so careless with our rights that we will let any group against our Democracy bulldoze it with politics?

Our constitution once led our officials elected by the people of this country to keep our freedoms safe from the other kinds of governments that we saw kill innocent people who had no rights like we have enjoyed in America. We still have the poor, mistreated, and misjudged; but this country has been the best one in this whole world when it comes to the rights to live free, the laws to protect against tyranny, and the will to share in spite of our differences once we understand “One Nation under God, indivisible, with Liberty and Justice FOR ALL!” is something we should still fight for!

Our country is not perfect, but we have led this planet with Democracy ever since we were formed. We’ve had bad leaders make horrible choices, but our Constitution is STILL the way to govern, the Bill of Rights are STILL worth fighting for to preserve, and our Vote is STILL something that needs to be protected with every legal means given to us! If we let any group take away our legislated voting system by illegal means then we will no longer be free. Do you want to live here if you have no say against unjust laws or penalties against freedoms you once had? I don’t think I ever can.

Am I suggesting suicide? Not while I still have Hope in Jesus Christ! Am I supporting violence? Not if there’s a legal way to defend! Am I giving a dark vision of the future we could have if we don’t WAKE UP? YES! These groups wanting to take over our country are not illusions or conspiracy theories; this would be a nightmare we may not wake up from if they take over this country completely. While some Christian prophecies have not come to pass as expected, the possibility that they have in clandestine ways we haven’t noticed could very well mean that they already have unknown.

The way the event of the Christmas Star is happening this Christmas in 2020 should make anyone who has read the Gospels think about how Jesus Christ told His disciples to be aware of the signs of the times that appear in the skies. Could Christians be missing the possible return of Jesus Christ during the time of a similar star to hail His return? Is the sky foretelling the rescue of His believers to evacuate them from Earth before the Great Tribulation begins? With these current political aggressions, Christianity may face a worse round of persecution seen since the time of the gladiators.

This is not meant to scare believers. This is meant to WAKE YOU UP! Christ-Believers roused for a while, but then the inability to meet due to the Covid-19 situation stopped the spiritual awakening. Believers might be able to reach individuals, so even if we don’t shake the world with a Revival we thought we’d have, we still might reach a last soul to be saved in the Church Age Grace Dispensation which seems to be the last piece of the cosmic puzzle of prophecy to be placed before Christians supernaturally disappear to be taken to safety before massive disasters worldwide happen.

Yes, the Covid-19 pandemic has shaken the world, destroying lives in so many ways due to people’s deaths, the job losses that have put people in dire situations, and the loss of so many rights we have had since before I was even born in this country. It’s hard to imagine something worse than what we’ve already seen, but it is possible since the Holy Bible stated that desperate times would happen even before the Great Tribulation truly begins. We haven’t seen the numbers of those having died that matches those listed for during the Great Tribulation, so that isn’t what is happening now.

The last great Revival is supposed to happen before Christians are evacuated, and with the current Covid-19 lock-downs that doesn’t seem possible unless churches find a way to connect through digital media, radio, CB or shortwave if digital stations or websites are confiscated or shut down by a new totalitarian regime. We are already being censored, so. it may come to the point when we won’t be able to text, email, or call someone without it being recorded or disconnected. I’m not paranoid. I’m honest and preparing myself for as many possible outcomes I can manage while I still have rights.

Perhaps we are still missing the one more puzzle piece that none of the theologians, historical laypeople, or those with spiritual gifts can see. Perilous times are already here in 2020, but since many believers before us suffered so much more, we may have to be refined by the fire of persecution to become the purist gold of Faith to shine the reality of God Almighty to the entire world. I don’t know, and I don’t want to go through any of it, but the fear that tries to overtake me at the thought will not prosper since I decided long ago that my ONLY Master is my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

Am I preaching death and destruction? I hope not. Am I warning Believers in Christ to buckle up and get ready for some rough riding through thorns of hate, prison, and maybe even lashes? Once again, I hope not. Is it possible that all of this had to happen to get us to let go of this world because we are holding onto it to it too much? I hope not, but it could be. I fail every day to do everything I can for my Savior, but I STILL BELIEVE in His Promises, Protection, and Purpose to Believers who will stand fast, blow the trumpet in warning, and WAIT FOR HIM to come in the blink of an eye.

Until then, I MUST keep singing even if it’s outlawed. I MUST keep songwriting even if no one listens. I MUST keep writing to reach anyone for Christ even if I’m imprisoned. I’m a realist who sees something wrong in churches that needs revived for the world to see Jesus Christ. DO YOU SEE WHAT I SEE? The shepherds praised God for our Savior at His birth. I’m willing to be thought of as a lowly beggar in this world to SEE HIM at His return that is imminent and prevalent at the moment of prophecy fulfillment. Jesus Christ is “King of Kings and Lord of Lords, Glory, Hallelujah!”

“What Really IS Important Christmas 2020”

By Tonja Condray Klein©12/02/20

I’m working on my song “The Colors of Christmas” and the lyrics reminded me of WHY it’s important to take time to celebrate as a Christian believer this time of year. I love the Santa movies in live action or old cartoon style. I love Rudolf who will always be my favorite reindeer. I love the mischievous kid movies that remind me of myself even now. I even love the Scrooge movies in all their different decades of production and differences. I love the lights, the songs, the new clothes, and the food at Christmas. All of those things still aren’t the reason why I love Christmas. Then what is it?

Christmas is what makes Easter possible. You can go into the whole ‘rebirth of nature’ aspect if you want, but for me it was the Resurrection of my Savior, and that couldn’t have happened without His birth. Linus from Peanuts says it as simply and truthfully as can be in that beloved movie, and since I still have a blanket I relate to him even more than most. It reminds me that even though the blanket is for comfort for me here on Earth, I have a Savior who sent my Comforter to me for my soul now and eternally. Money, power, or even gifts don’t really matter. My greatest gift of all time is Jesus!

Many don’t believe that He even came, and others deny even the reality of God Almighty, but as for me and my house we will serve the Lord as the Son incarnate who arrived over 2000 years ago as a human baby to later become our Salvation 33 years or so later. It’s not a fantasy or a fable, and not even just a story. There is more historical evidence for the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ than they have for any other life-altering person. I haven’t seen Him like the disciples did, but I have felt His presence by His Holy Spirit too many times to doubt His prophesied purpose.

The star that shined to lead three wise-men who arrived a couple years later, the angels who proclaimed to the shepherds that came, and the animals that watched it all happened as the Holy Bible states. Others can scoff or even get angry, but I see it as the moment humanity was placed on the pathway to restoration! As I celebrate my husband and me surviving Covid-19, and my mother surviving an infection that almost took her life, I can give thanks for that Baby who came to give us all LIFE ETERNAL if we only accept HIS GIFT this holiday season – Faith even a child can believe.

Do I ever doubt? Well, like the character Charlie in the movie about addiction to shoes (one of my favorites, and reminds me of my much older sister!), I also ask, “If you never doubt then why would you need faith?” This is an ongoing learning experience in the Christian life. Jesus likes to show up where and when you sometimes least expect Him – in the grocery line, in the dollar store, or even in a doctor’s office. I know it because I have had it happen. Moments of Grace are around us every single day if we keep our eyes open and our hearts focused. Like in a manger, Jesus Christ shows up!

If ever Christian believers needed to be praying over this holiday season it is NOW. There are a lot of situations in our country and the world that need the loving and changing touch of Jesus Christ to be given in the same way as the time of His birth to bring peace on Earth and good will toward mankind, in spite of our differences. Hearts need to be changed, minds need to be mended, lives need to be healed, and people of every nation need to be restored. The love of Jesus can do it all, but His people need to release His power everywhere by Prayer, Praise, and practical exhibition of Freedom!

Revival is Coming… DO NOT FEAR!

Is Redemption Drawing Near Sooner Than Expected?

By Tonja Condray Klein(c)11/24/20

I’ve read apologetic Biblical works, prophetic Biblical studies, and even historical non-Biblical books, but what’s been making me question some of the teachings I’ve studied for the last thirty-five years of my forty-eight has been how prophecies have been fulfilled in undeniable ways but revival has been brought to a grinding halt. Covid-19 lockdowns in 2020 have made Christian meetings outlawed in some places, but even before then hadn’t many already stopped trying to change their communities in a positive way? Didn’t many quit praying? Didn’t many just give up completely? From what I’ve read in all of the Christian ‘end-of-times’ main teachings, ‘true’ believers in Jesus Christ were to have a Revival like has never been seen before that leads to the last soul to be saved in the ‘Grace Dispensation’ that immediately causes the ‘calling away’/‘meeting in the sky’/‘Christian evacuation’ known as ‘the Rapture’ before the Great Tribulation begins. If things expected to happen a certain way doesn’t then does it mean we missed the point where it would have but we failed the test of understanding and awareness of the present times like the foolish virgins? Will it not now? I don’t know.

Prophecies are interpreted differently by various groups of people, but many had been in one accord for the past few years, so I’m asking what many believers are right now, “WHAT HAPPENED?” While some still preach the Gospel in several media formats, Covid-19 has limited or even stopped the coming together of churches for an in-person revival, so what now? While we have technology to keep spreading the Gospel of Jesus Christ on ‘airways’ if nowhere else, what about if (or when) those media outlets take away the platforms to silence us? When our everyday rights and freedoms are being limited or taken, what makes us think for even a moment that any anti-religious group now in power won’t use this opportunity to outlaw any size of gathering if we hold true to our callings? I never thought in my lifetime that I’d see this possibility, but as things happening in 2020 begin to reach the place that screams critical mass reached, we should take an inventory of our beliefs, evaluate our plans, and strengthen our fortitude to keep our Faith while trying to keep the peace until we have no choice but to practice social disobedience to fight for our Constitutional rights and freedoms.

Many outlets have already begun to ban any opinion they don’t agree with, so how much longer will we have a right to express ours individually or even as a group? We really need to be figuring out our plan to not be silenced if our freedoms now become only freedom for others. Being a singer, songwriter, author, and webpage designer I’m really not taking anything for granted since my ‘voice’ could be taken in a single moment. Are you thinking about that if you are a believer who depends on channels, radio, media outlets, bookstores, websites, web hosting companies, online stores, and all other technological advances that only a few corporations actually control? What will you do when or if they pull the plug? I’m not trying to instill panic but want believers in Christ to be mindful of this situation now. I posted long ago on my tribulationhelp.com site about how people during the Great Tribulation might be able to maintain freedom with their faith without underground technology, but WE might have to use those ourselves now. Are you ready for something like that? You should be checking backup plans, backup supplies, and backup media should we face this now in 2020.

I’m NOT part of a survivalist group. I’m NOT part of some religious order demanding money. I’m NOT against our Constitutional Democracy when it follows what is stated in our founding documents. What I AM is a Christian who is NOT going to stop spreading the Good News of the Gospel of Jesus Christ! If you are part of a different religion then you still need to be concerned since this possible totalitarian regime that may take over soon will be against ANY RELIGION that isn’t their government. Many of you were not taught about the USSR (what Russia used to be) and their methods of a total governmental control. It saddens me that two generations have lost knowledge that I now prize more than all of the diamonds in the world! I WAS ALIVE WHEN THE USSR STIL EXSTED! I SAW EVIL THEY DID TO THEIR OWN PEOPLE! I SAW IT TELEVISED! I READ ACCOUNTS OF THE ONES WHO ESCAPED! IT HAPPENED EVEN IF YOUR SCHOOOL NEVER TOLD YOU! This is why former President Ronald Reagan said that Democracy is only a generation from extinction. Once education becomes indoctrination then our freedom and democracy is lost.

I READ. I QUESTION. I STUDY. I TEST. If something doesn’t match known history, proven science, linear mathematics, and basic Christian theology at the same time then it doesn’t pass the test of REALITY for me. That may seem a bit theoretical, heretical, and anti-establish-mental, but it is the scientific method at heart even if those in a field disagree. I’m not looking for funding or a grant, so take your assessment elsewhere. My point is? There is a reality that has existed since time began, and some yahoos running our country now are trying to rewrite history, redefine science, and nullify mathematics for the purpose of making generations younger than mine be unable to know the absolutes that were proven in every single one of these varied disciplines that held for historians, scientists, mathematicians, and even theologians for centuries up to millennia! THEY SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO DO THIS! When did most of the parents claiming to be Christian give up the educating of their genealogical lines to be done by atheists or ‘worse’? Yes, ‘worse’ than atheist is rather troubling, isn’t it? At least atheists just say there is NO god. ‘Worse’ claim to BE god.

How will we as Christians or even people of other faiths not in power endure this coming storm against freedoms and rights? With technology changing so rapidly and abilities to circumvent the biased channels to even give your opinion without it being removed happening, I’m not sure what our path to being as free as we have been will be now. Freedom of Speech was given by our Founding Fathers for this country. I will fight in all the ways I can to make sure that I don’t lose it completely. Maybe this was what was needed to instigate the final Christian Revival but in ways we didn’t image in the United States of America. I’m still not sure. I’m really not sure of much of anything except in the Salvation by Faith in the Blood of Jesus Christ and infilling of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of Speaking in other Tongues with promised Gifts if we simply repent and allow redemption to happen. I’m like Paul the Apostle when I say that I speak in tongues as often as others but seek prophecy to uplift and encourage believers in these last days. Paul thought he was living in the last days back then, and that was in early AD, so we are closer if not there yet. Redemption may draw near sooner than expected…

“Truth from a Real RRMS Survivor” – 11/23/20

By Tonja Condray Klein

I was diagnosed with Multiple Scleroses in 2004 after having a Grand Mal seizure. Migraine headaches happened the summer before the seizure, and some neurologists say it’s a continuum with neurological disorders. It was a sign that I didn’t know could mean something else was wrong. I’d dealt with allergies and respiratory infections since a child, so I’d taken medication for that all of my life. After several tests I was put on a MS medication, but I took it for only a year, I’m the kind of patient who researches any medicine I take to make sure it’s the best for whatever condition I have. Symptoms listed on reputable sites for regular MS didn’t match what I was experiencing, so I gradually stopped the MS medication in 2005. I still had allergies, respiratory infections, and viruses, but no symptoms like before and no seizures.

For seven years I went without any MS medications and didn’t seem to have any symptoms. Even the migraines never happened again. Then in 2012 I had two Grand Mal seizures the same day separated by hours and two trips to the hospital, where they kept me after the second seizure. I was diagnosed with Relapsing-Remitting Multiples Scleroses – RRMS – by a different Neurologist who became my new one until he retired in 2020. After I was placed on a different MS medication, I went without any problem for three years, so it had seemed I’d finally been placed on correct treatment. The MS went into remission until 2015 when the medicine injection developed a painful red rash. I went to the ER, but they said it was muscles spasms and sent me home with pain medicine. The ER doctor didn’t even check the site.

When the injection site got worse, I went to my primary care physician and she saw it was cellulitis, a dangerous situation for anyone with MS. She sent me immediately to the hospital with her referral and demand for proper care. I was there for a few days on pain medicine as they began antibiotics. They sent me home with antibiotics, but after the course at home the cellulitis again began to be so painful I was screaming and couldn’t walk. My supportive husband who is an amazing hospital IT Technician took me to the ER for the third time. Once they did extractions of the tissue in that thigh area, it turned out to be a flesh-eating infection. They began another round of antibiotics, but that wasn’t working so the physician who was a surgeon for this type of condition decided to do surgery to remove that part of my thigh.

17cm wide x 9cm high x 2cm deep was my mantra for the months after the surgery. I had to allow a nurse to then come to our place to change the dressing for my open wound that my husband and I had to change between her visits. If a catastrophe would happen in Dayton, Ohio then I would be well prepared to change wounds of anyone affected now. The fact that I had to change the bandages for the wound my husband had after surgery for a different infection also prepared me for the road to recovery of my own. What nothing prepared me for was the emotional trauma of it all, the feeling of a helplessness that I hadn’t felt as strong as I did through this. Let me try to explain. “I” am the “Go-To Girl” in my family. Though I’ve always been sickly I’ve been positive. This brought me to my knees to make me question all I believed.

Even while in the hospital I was part of a launch team for a fellow author releasing his new Christian Fantasy Novel that I texted positive responses as support. I also found out that my original song “Dancin’ on the Wind” that I wrote and sang as a recorded single was number 7 in the Fan Favorites 2015 countdown for the Sounds of the Valley radio program on local station WGNZ! In the midst of this mayhem, God Almighty was still using my music to bless others. It was humbling as I lay in the hospital bed, and I was so thankful for the blessings and talents my Creator has given to me, but I was still fighting for my life then and continued to after I got home to recover. Recovery was the dragging months of personal, mental, physical, and spiritual battles that I never would have won on my own.

While I had been in the hospital before my surgery, I had a couple of really bad moments of telling myself that I was failing because my body was weak and I couldn’t ever be what I was supposed to be as a Christian singer, songwriter, and novelist. In tears, I’d sat there one night berating myself over opportunities I had wasted and what was happening was my punishment for that failure. It was then when God Almighty, my Savior Jesus Christ had His Holy Spirit to remind me who I am by putting my own song that I’d written back in the 1980’s and released as a single in 2015 “My Captain” in my memory. My own words spoke comfort to me, and how do you deny a message that you knew was true that many decades ago? You can’t. You can try, but it will ring in your heart as the bell of victory over the lies of disease and destruction.

The moments of tears, frustration, anger, depression, uselessness, weakness, and fear can make you wish you could leave this world to be with God and those who have joined Him through Faith in Jesus already. It is such a hard temptation to resist when you know it would be so easy to give up and let the MS render you without any ability to be bothered to be used ever again. It would be so easy at times to lie down, take more pain medicine than you need, and to simply let go. It would be, but it isn’t supposed to be. Do you know why? Even if you end up in a wheelchair once you lose the ability to walk, if you can talk then you can encourage someone else. Even if you can’t see anymore, you can become a storyteller in ways you’d never imagined. “Even if” by MercyMe has meaning then and even now.

Am I always so positive? I already told that I’m not. Do I always see a way out of the moments of aggravation from not being able to do what I want or need to do but can’t because this disease stops me? No, I lose my temper, say or write things I have to ask God for forgiveness for, and try to remember that every breath I breathe is a gift from Heaven since this disease has not caused damage to my brain cells that control that. It’s the main point I’m trying to make – YOU are HERE for HIM. Even if you aren’t a Christian, YOU are HERE for HIM. Jesus knew you before you heard of Him. Jesus saw you before you were born. Jesus died for you even if you still doubt He exists. MS may take away parts of your life you will mourn, but Jesus can give life and life more abundantly to you if YOU let HIM. Even with MS.

The CIS (Clinical Isolated Syndrome), RRMS (Relapsing-Remitting), PPMS (Primary-Progressive), or SPMS (Secondary-Progressive) types of Multiple Sclerosis can destroy your life or give you a reason to fight for it. Each type has its own symptoms, treatments, challenges, and physical deteriorations that are different for each individual but can change between types. What I went through may not be what anyone else experiences, but the feelings this disease can cause can be the same for those who have any type of a disability because of MS. Before MS, I received almost a full scholarship for Computer Science major and teaching minor but had to withdraw due to missing class from allergies causing infections, but I got my Webpage Development Certificate in 1999 for business that I still use in 2020.

Since MS, I’ve published two Fantasy Novels and released my first Music EP Album of original songs I wrote and sing. I’m fighting MS all the way! I’m not some amazing exception to the rule of this disease’s horrors. This is meant to encourage those in physical battles against whatever type of this disease you have. DO NOT GIVE UP! Jesus Christ is still Lord, Savior, Healer, God Almighty as the Son, Creator, Redeemer, Forgiver, Restorer, and Source of our strength if we let Him take our burdens as we fight through Faith in Him and His Promises. Although I may eventually die from this, I will still keep fighting MS until then. Even if the feelings overwhelm me at times, and I feel like I have failed in all I’ve tried to do for Jesus and people around the world, I will still keep fighting MS. I’m in remission, but I will still fight MS!

Three MS medications failed me. This fourth one is working, but that can change at any moment. My only hope is truly in my Faith in Jesus Christ since He goes beyond anything to help with healing when we need Him. Sometimes God says, “No.” I will keep hoping that He won’t since I do believe I have more to do for Him. When the time comes for me to leave Earth for Heaven, I will be sad at what I will miss with those I love here that remain. My only Hope is that they will know Jesus as Savior and join me when it’s time for them. With the way things are in 2020, I don’t know how much time we have until ALL BELIEVERS IN CHRIST WILL BE RESCUED AND TAKEN TO HEAVEN. It will happen, and if things keep going the way they have been with the Covid-19 situation and contested election, we may leave sooner.

I have met other MS patients who have been in wheelchairs or otherwise disabled, and my heart aches for them. I can still walk, dance, talk, sing, move my hands and feet, hold things in my hands, carry things from place to place, and I otherwise have full control over my physical faculties. The only damage is that I sometimes don’t remember names like I used to be able to more easily or I forget things I need to take from one room to another before I take others and have to go back. Since I’m 48 years old, I honestly don’t think that’s too bad on the aging mentality level! I stay tired. That’s my biggest complaint, but I also have insomnia at times and use those moment to write instead of complain (if I can). My life has been good, and it still is good now. We have our good days and our bad, and I’d rather be alive and still fighting MS.

My hubby will be 53 in 2021, I’ll be 49, my sister will be 71, and my Mom will be 90. Depending on how these final Christian prophecies are met will determine if we will still be here when the ‘rescue’, ‘evacuation’, ‘catching away’, ‘Rapture’ of the Believers in the Blood of Jesus Christ will happen. We might die before millions to billions disappear at the same time here on Earth. It seems to be getting closer, and I’m hoping to go together, but regardless of that I hope that people will think about the reality of Jesus Christ, His Sacrifice on Calvary for our fallen state, and personal gift He has as Salvation by Grace and through Faith in Him so we can find the reality of eternity waiting for us. Even if MS or age takes us, we need to be ready when we meet Him once we leave this mortal body. I now have an MS-free one waiting!