By Tonja Condray Klein©08/10/2021

One of the hardest things I’ve ever gone through has been watching something I created to encourage believers and be used to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ in a way like C.S. Lewis did but then watch as those I thought understood and supported reaching the souls my heart longs to see be saved to instead judge it as something they couldn’t get behind for being different. In the days of Christ the spirit of the Pharisees was dead legalism, and this still blinds some even now. Paul was meant to become the apostle for the Gentiles, but he was a religious man who was killing Christians as Saul first. He had to finally be knocked off of his donkey and blinded on the road to Damascus for him to SEE JESUS and become Paul the apostle. How could Christians back then forgive Saul even after his conversion for what he’d done before?

How many of these “Paul-s” have had those claiming to be Christian denounce them because they only remember a Saul instead of a rebirthed Paul? Or is the meaning behind the gifts or ministries of any new “Paul” given for spreading the Gospel of Jesus Christ being dismissed since it might only reach a few? Are churches afraid that a REAL REVIVAL will begin because of those against their dead messages who instead actually PREACH NEW LIFE IN CHRIST? I know that churches MUST verify Gifts and ministries used in services, but I also think that some are too scared when it comes to certain Gifts being allowed. If a church is NOT full-gospel then that’s their right; if a church CLAIMS to BE FULL-GOSPEL then they better stop giving FALSE advertising of Gifts that aren’t being allowed in service by members!

I’ve been to several different church denominations over my almost 49 years now, and although I agree most with the Assembly of God teachings and King James Bible, I have gone to and/or sung in Baptist, Brethren, Church of Christ, Nazarene, and even Catholic churches. I’m Full-Gospel but against legalism and lean to Non-Denominational now. I can wear a dress or skirt-suit if necessary with hose and heels, but I prefer my sneakers, blue jeans, and witnessing tee-shirts. Many can’t afford the kind of clothes that some churches seem to demand once someone is ‘Born-Again’. I’m ashamed that some people won’t darken a church door because they fear rejection for that alone! I agree we can’t have people not properly covered, but judging others when you haven’t walked down the path in their shoes is wrong if you won’t help.

No, I don’t agree with the ‘anything goes’ mentality that some ‘progressive’ churches practice either, but outward appearance seems to be the sign of ‘righteousness’ that some churches preach instead of Grace. Rules exclude people who might not even have what they need to buy food sometimes. Even though my parents were both retired on Social Security I did wear dresses when I was about eleven so I would be ‘accepted’ by leaders to then sing in church. My point is that the True Church of the Lord Jesus Christ needs to be looking for those “Saul-s” that are supposed to become “Paul-s” for the Gospel of Jesus Christ to be preached EVERYWHERE TO EVERYONE… especially to those without pantyhose! ‘Judge not lest ye be judged!’ Remember that scripture? The True Church needs to be focusing on sharing the Gospel NOT law.

I have been used openly with Messages in Tongues in churches, but I have also been used when I was given them but spoke under my voice out of respect for that denomination’s teachings. The pastor gave the Interpretations to them so he obviously had that Gift even if he didn’t publically acknowledge it. I didn’t have a problem with how God worked out the Messages being Interpreted ‘under the radar’ sort-of-speak, but I still long to see the days of ALL of God’s Gifts being used in concert during a service in a church brave enough to allow the Holy Spirit to break free to set people free in a way nothing else ever could! I’ve seen it happen in person in my teenage years! Saul had to be knocked down to become Paul. Some church people need knocked out in church service – by the Holy Spirit of God not by people – and life changing.

I’ve NEVER been afraid of letting God Almighty of the Christian Faith to allow my mouth and tongue move the way the Holy Spirit was in control of doing because I TRUST THE GIFTS SINCE I KNOW THE SAVIOR WHO SENT THEM! This did NOT end when the original apostles died. Peter told the apostles on the Day of Pentecost that the Gifts were FOR THEM, THEIR CHILDREN, THEIR CHILDREN’S CHILDREN, AND THOSE AFAR OFF. I’m just one of THOSE AFAR OFF! I’m not brainwashed. I didn’t take a course to learn how to do this. I wasn’t given instructions by a shrouded guru. I felt the Holy Spirit overshadow me in service and shook me gently but with purpose. The church stilled, and I called out to the Pastor that I needed the Gift of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of Speaking in other Tongues.

“Come on down!” was the reply, and I went up front to the Pastor. He simply touched my forehead lightly as he prayed, and I went down under the Power of God Almighty through His Holy Spirit to begin having initial stuttering lips. THIS IS REAL. I’M PROOF! I was only 13 years old, but I never doubted the Gifts when the Holy Spirit would still the service and begin speaking through me in a tongue I’d never known before! I wasn’t afraid because the Everlasting Love of My Savior would FILL ME with such Joy and Completion unlike anything else I have experienced. It’s amazing when you allow that kind of connection with God Almighty Our Creator. I pray in the Spirit daily, but Gifts like Messages, the Interpretations, and Prophecies are something for God’s Glory to His church and unbelievers to show HIS POWER.

Paul told the Gentile churches that they needed to let the Holy Spirit fill them so they could show the world that God Almighty was Lord of everything, able to do anything, and wanting to know all who would know HIM if they just give up their authority and give His their permission to flow through them to reach others for Him. It’s not for any to be church superstars or more important than someone else. These Gifts are only for HIS GLORY to reach the dying world NOW MORE THAN EVER BEFORE! How things are shaping up in 2021 makes me wonder how much longer Grace Dispensation or the Church Age will continue. We need the LAST GREAT REVIVAL before the Rapture of Christian believers happens, but how can it when churches refuse to let the Holy Spirit into their buildings let alone their hearts?

If Saul hadn’t been taken in by the disciple Ananias as the Lord had spoken when Saul was still blind from seeing Jesus appear to him on the road to Damascus then Paul never would have become the Apostle for Gentiles. That would’ve been one of the greatest losses the church would’ve had then. How many new “Paul-s” were left behind because judging ‘disciples’ who God told to get him refused for fear of incriminating letters that “Saul” carried before Christ claimed him? How many new “Paul-s” now are trying to do something that might lead your children or grandchildren to Jesus but have been stopped due to a misunderstanding or prejudice that says, “Only THIS type of ministry is acceptable – not yours!”? Yes, there are limits so don’t misunderstand me, but why are so many fearful of things NOT against Biblical teachings?

Who came to the grave of Jesus Christ to find He had risen? A former prostitute! Are you going to cast out former Mary Magdalene-s since they don’t fit your mold? Who do you think you are as church leaders? Not of God if you refuse to see the beam in your own eye while kicking out those with a speck in theirs! No, you wouldn’t let a former sex offender teach Sunday school, but maybe if you really believed in ATONEMENT then you might at least disciple that person with the Word of God to be made whole! Yes, Sorcerer “Simon-s” exist out there that want to ‘buy’ the Holy Spirit, but a Gift of Discernment would keep it from happening if you would allow the Holy Spirit full access to your services. If we truly believe ‘There’s Power in The Blood’ then maybe we could let that Holy Power He sent Save, Deliver, Heal, and Fill!

We MUST forgive Saul! Even if he holds the parchment with our name on it for punishment by the Synagogue or Rome, we MUST forgive SAUL! If we don’t then how can we have “Romans 8:38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” We CAN’T LET jealousy, envy, pride, doctrine, or personal feelings make us dismiss a SAUL once he’s on his way to being PAUL! Who are ANY of US to interfere with the Will of God Almighty when it comes to WHO HE WANTS IN HIS CHURCH?! I’d wear a dress every time I’d go through the door if I could find a church that actually LET God’s Holy Spirit work there!

Am I still hurt over something I worked on for seven years and spent hundreds of dollars to bring to life to reach those my heart is longing to go to Heaven that need that extra push that’s different from just religion? Yes, because it has a story that shows Forgiveness, Family, Faith, Gifts, Love, Redemption, Rescue, and so many things that can show Jesus to people the way our Savior appeared to Paul on that road! Do I hate those who misunderstood and stopped it being used the way God intended on one platform? No, since God will use another if it’s HIS will. Does it prod me on to write songs, keep marketing my novels, and do Op-Eds to maybe reach ONE soul to find faith in Christ? YES!!! Is what I do perfect? NO! Is anything anyone else here does perfect right now? NO! We ALL need to be redeemed by Jesus Christ!

Forgive Saul and let him be Paul! Help him be restored. Help him learn the Bible. Help him to believe so he can write songs, books, or even speak to groups that need HIS testimony the most! I’m not a theologian, but I do KNOW the Word of God and try to LIVE by it even though I fail. We are ALL still Living by Faith. I will stand one day on my own before the Judgement Seat of Christ to give an account of my life and see things burn in the crucible, but I also KNOW I will see some gold, silver, and precious stones in the midst of the wood, hay, and stubble. I don’t want to ever see that I failed to love, support, and help someone in church to grow but instead judged them as needing to be something more to my own standards selfishly. I might judge fallen angels one day, but we’re NOT supposed to hurt the new Paul-s!

Paul was the one who warned us in Galatians 5:9 that, “A little leaven leaveneth the whole lump.” I have tried to make sure what I wrote in my parable-style stories was not filled with leaven but the concepts of Christ that would reach beyond mere religious platitudes and SHOW JESUS in a way the world, and hopefully the church would find to give us what we need in these final days of Grace. If I failed, it will burn in front of me. If I succeeded then maybe one soul was saved. Between that I have to try to NOT dismiss the new Paul-s and instead encourage them with the Gifts and callings from our Savior for the souls needing saved, delivered, healed, and filled to FIND JESUS when the Holy Spirit restores communion with God Almighty by the Holy Spirit inside as the restored Pneuma that humanity lost when Adam fell!

Someone can be saved without ever allowing the Gifts to be used through them. Everyone who accepts Jesus as Savior has the Holy Spirit restore where the Pneuma used to be so that you can commune with the Father. The Blood of Jesus Christ saves each believer. The Filling is an Overflow of the Gifts from within that the Holy Spirit can only use in you if you give Him permission. I’ve known several people in my life that never spoke in Tongues but had Gifts that all were obviously from God just not as visible as some of the more public ones can be. While I completely agree with Peter about the Gifts and Paul about the leaven, I also know that each person has to decide what they want to do for the Savior and let Him guide you through the Holy Bible with the understanding the Holy Spirit can give. Paul tells all about it!

Un-forgiveness is a hurt that will cripple you through your life. If someone has hurt you then you must give it to Jesus for Him to heal that pain and allow you to let it go. It’s not easy, especially when it happens from someone that you trusted and felt kindred with in church or your own family. The hurt still tries to stop what God wants for you to do even if you keep forgiving by choice. Even offering an olive branch sometimes doesn’t work no matter how you try to mend a rift the enemy is trying to use against you, but remember the promise given in “Isaiah 54:17  No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgement thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.” Amen and amen!